Yesterday I did a Boudoir photo shoot. Really. I did. AND I LOVED IT!!! I’ve had the amazing pleasure of a friend who pushes my boundaries when it comes to owning my power and getting comfortable in my sensuality. She recently recommended THIS BOOK and while the title scared me, the content struck me deeply as something ALL of us need to read, men included.
With the release of my memoir last year, the subject of how we show up as women in this society has been in the forefront of my thinking. When I was a kid, I thought of myself as a tomboy and hated wearing dresses. As I grew into a teenager, I wanted to embrace my femininity, but I didn’t really know how. My mom didn’t wear much makeup and wasn’t into fashion as far as I could tell. I tried, but it all felt awkward to me, so I’d throw on jeans and a sweatshirt and go. Even writing this I realize that my kid perspective of femininity revolved almost exclusively around appearance. I’m finally seeing and OWNING that it’s SO MUCH MORE than that.
I’ve always been a strong woman. I was physically strong as a kid in gymnastics and transferred that athletic strength into other sports and passions later. I was headstrong and knew what I wanted most of my life. I have never been afraid to state my opinions whether they flow with the norms or not. And through all the times I saw myself as a strong woman, I thought that it was because I was pretty masculine. I attributed all my strength not to my femininity but to my masculinity.
As a mom raising two children of different genders, I try hard not to put our societal conditioning on them. It’s a constant effort. Since both of mine seem to steer down the path of identifying with their biological gender, it’s even harder. I’m happy my son has embraced PINK lately, but we all know that’s just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to this topic.
Yesterday, after the photo shoot and seeing the images, I felt more feminine than I may have ever before in my life. And, it wasn’t because I weigh as little as I’ve ever weighed. It wasn’t because I am killing it at work and life. It wasn’t because I am anywhere near perfect. It was because I have started to understand that there was something shut down and shut off in me when I was young that I am getting back to. Call it my GPS. Call it the goddess inside of me. Call it the divine feminine. Call it whatever you want, it feels good.
Ten years ago, if you had told me I’d do a boudoir shoot when I was 42, I’d have laughed at you. One of the best things that comes from aging is GROWTH. Spiritual, mental and emotional growth. If we don’t cherish ourselves and celebrate ourselves, we can’t show up and do our best work in the world. Sometimes for me that looks like taking a day off work to go skiing. Sometimes it’s taking a day off kids to do work. Sometimes it’s just having another cup of tea and thinking away from this computer.
As Mother’s Day approaches (and my ten-year anniversary with Jay), I have been thinking a lot about how we celebrate women in our society. The women take care of everyone. If I have a mom on my homeopathic membership, the whole family stays healthier. When moms thrive, so does the rest of the family, and when women thrive, so does the rest of society. Who are the women in your life that need some love? Give one of them a call today and remind them how amazing they are and how much they mean to you. If you are a woman and don’t have amazing sisters in your life, think about the women you’d want in that role and reach out to them. Start building the relationships that will not only keep you afloat but SHINING AS BRIGHTLY as we all know you can. Happy Mother’s Day to all the moms! Celebrate YOU!!